happy

been v skeptical abt things lately. always arguing. be it arguing with ppl or God. ya. i knw it's not gd. like why wld arguing with God be gd. always being so arguementative. ha. m still trying to master self-control.

back-stabbing. it can just be a few simple words or just a simple gesture to back-stab someone. after living 18 years on this planet, i finally understood the meaning of back-stabbing. some even do it w/o realising. ya. and i realised gossip can also be a form of back-stabbing. and i realised, i did just that.

it wasn't intentional.

loving ppl with the love of God is just so hard. knowing u have to accept some ppl in ur life and eating humble pie is not easy. i've accepted difficult ppl into my lives and they seem easier than ppl who appears easy-going.

alright. so some ppl just need a lil bit of attention. just a lil bit of attention is alright wad... i've been giving attention to ppl all over the place that i don't even pay any attention to things ard me now. just so hard. but i knw God's dealing with my pride. ahhhhhhh...

i'm bringing myself back to where i was in p6. hahahaha.... if not for all these things that happened, i wld be a super proud and dao person, probably doing super well in studies, maybe in nj or hc... but what's the pt...

i'm not a person who suits a high-flyer or a scholar.

i'm just an ordinary being. ordinary person with ordinary capabilities.

the only difference is that i have a great and mighty God (=(=

the time of trying is tough. but by God's grace. i've faith to carry on.

suddenly, after laying down a burden that i've been carrying for so long, it just feels so weird. but i'm glad it's gone. finally, i have a conclusion. i just have a feeling it's not the end yet. but now, i'm just trying to enjoy everyday of my life, spending time with God, drawing closer to Him before another situation resurfaces. i knw God's in control. even if it does happens again, i knw i'll have the strength to go thru it if not the wisdom.

there're somethings u just won't understand and won't be able to guess. coz u have got no idea(: