a sad story.

it's been so long
it's been so very long
to speak words of truth
to not lie to u
not lie to myself
the truth really hurts
to share the joy
the hurts and sorrows
laughter, we both
know it well it hurt
our innermost of hearts
we weren't truthful
lying was
the only solution left
in attempt to
keep in touch
make each other happy
assuring me things
they were the same
we didn't go too far
remembering
reading
emotions flood my mind
after all these years
finally understood
u were so lost
u were helpless, too
when i left
tried to hide the pain
hide the gifts
hide the memories
i can't stop
noticing it that surfaced
i can't continue
wake me up from this nightmare
i wish u wld say
something, anything
to say u still care
tho i know it's too late
unless ur still waiting
im regretting, i know
u were crying in ur heart
saying u were alright
u inhaled deeply
and said "ya,i'm ok"
just as i was and am
u probably never knew
i cried
each time u loved me
i cried
each time i failed u
and i'm crying
because i've lost u
because i chose
to deny my heart
and i cried
when i hung up.