God, You're joking, are You?

oh wells. i'm glad i have a God who disciplines me. at least there's someone who corrects me and i don't feel unjust.

ahah... actually i'm feeling very sleepy now. but i have to blog. haha. for no apparent reason.

these few days have been better. thank God (= haha. at least, ok, well, it was good to have coursework and homework and housework to keep me busy. at least it kept me from spending alot of free time stoning and just doing nth. yea. thank God for giving me the urgency to get started on my web. the importance of A levels worked for once. haha..

my math is catching up. at least now i do my tutorials. thank God for the change of attitude also. haha. my God is a great God! i can't imagine having to go thru all that w/o Him, my source of comfort and shelter. God is truely amazing when it comes to Him being there for me. He's just so awesome. to think i always have lil debates with Him. my God has a sense of humour tho, apparently they always prove me wrong. (= but i'm glad.

staying away's probably the best route i'm taking. like what claressa said on her nick: it's when i want it so much that i know i've got to stay away. i don't want to be at a point of temptation because i chose to be there. it just doesn't make sense. the Bible says "flee from temptation" yet here i am tempted in every way, sinning in many, whereas Jesus was blameless.

i made the decision and i don't want u to worry about anything. if u cld just let it be, maybe it'll turn out better? i can't vouch for that but i know God holds my future. He holds our future in His hands. and i trust Him.

i was writing cell feedback and comments for jo. i realised how much the cell really needs and how much it really has, and then i thot about the first time when God spoke to me about leadership and stuff, the first vision for the cell God gave me, the times i found it so difficult, the times when i tasted the fruits of my labour. it's easy to grow plants, but it ain't easy to grow people, but it is most precious when people grow.

going for prayer mtg 2mr and i'm happy about it. i'm always looking forward to thursdays. will be able to see jiajia, rach, and so on... haha...

i knw i've made ppl worried. chon can't seem to stop asking me whether i'm ok. but it's when i know why i refused to tell anyone that i understood how u probably would be feeling right now. but i'm consoled. coz i know u'll be alright (=