errr...

ever had a time when God's words were so clear to u that it made u wake up? haha...in other words, God was blunt with me. i know at times ps rachel was also like that but it helped (= yea. and at times, God was also like that too. but it didn't really shook me as much as He did today.

when ur stressed and fed-up, it doesn't give u the right to do the things u want and go ur way and sin BIG TIME. k those words really shook me hard. it was as though God was saying to me straight in the face with that dao look and all.

i guess i really gave my 100% in destressing today. but i knew it was wrong to do so. it's that kind of feeling that u know what ur doing is wrong yet u continue to do it, blantantly.

ha. but i was a good girl. i went to study with wil today. managed to do a few qns of estimation and then i was freezing alr. haha. strange that coffee bean was freezing even though i was just sitting next to the door. *shrugs* ha. then there were 3 cheeena ppl arguing and quarreling. oh boy. that lasted for more than 3 hours. i wldn't be surprised if they started since morning. ha. good stamina tho. but they irritated wil big time. haha. he almost wanted to go over and kill them all. i think i've been a v bad friend. i cldn't stop laughing at the way he described everything about everything that happened. hahahaha... ya. but for one thing, i cldn't stop shaking my head whenever they said smth too loud or just too irritaitng. haha it was tt bad. ahhh...

ya well today was a special prayer mtg combinded with all other churches for some events thing. ya. was surprised to see so many new faces and new ppl. haha. like what happened? got revival? haha... if only...

i think first love is always the most difficult to get over and move on, esp when u really really love someone that much. it's the same when i rmb my first love when i came back to God. it's smth that really stays in u, that really forms the bench mark of anything after that. same analogy. probably tt's y.

i see u rising in me again. ah. it's this weird feeling again. i wish it cld be like before.