God

come Lord Jesus and take Your place.

i realised i haven't been a good girl recently. i blame the world cup, yet i blame myself.

i've been running and i'm tired.

God just doesn't seem like He used to be in the past
because i've changed.

i've walked on the path of destruction.
because i'm at a cross-road.
and i took the easy way out.

i realise i'm destroying others too.
it's a chain reaction.
the domino effect.
though i don't know why i would affect others.

God allows mistakes to happen.
in order to make us grow and get on the right track again.

but will i ever get back?
it's never too late.

stop the rebel inside of me.
or will it take over?

God has a great future planned out infront of me.
yet i'm not taking it from Him.
i hate plannings.

education has ruined me.
i'm taking a step back.
i don't want to be intelligent anymore.
not anymore.

i dread studying.
it's of no use to me. really.
so what if i really get 4As.
i'll feel happy.definite.
but i don't achieve anything.

the future doesn't mean much to me now.
all i care is now.
i've been focusing too much on the future.
neglecting what i have in hand now.

similiar to when i played collapse.
focused too much on an area.
neglecting the most crucial part.

i don't wanna be a leader.
i wanna be a follower.
i wanna play a supporting role.

i wish i could start life anew.
knowing i would live my life the same.
wish i didn't have to clear my mess.
but i know God's giving me the discount.

if God gave me the chance to love again.
i wouldn't want.

if God gave me the opportunity again.
i wouldn't want.

i'll prolly live in regret.
until i see u again.

know what, i wore my glasses.
and i looked at things differently.
i've never been so dark in my whole life before.

and i realised.
i used to listen intently and give respect.
now, i analyse and disagree.

education has ruined me.
i wanna be back where i was with You.
i wanna...

they have left.
but 'left' is relative.
they are still here.
only distant.